Hell'sa Hufflepuff
by Half-Winchester
Summary: Told that she wasn't brave, studious, or connected enough for anywhere else, Magdaline was sent to the only house left. A ball of near-explosive rage,amidst her fellow misfits she struggles with the eternal question 'What the hell's a Hufflepuff'


**Historian Note: **This story follows the timeline of Prisoner of Askaban._ Main character is a fifth year, and her name is pronounced as MagdaLINE._

_Rated T for general bad-assery_

Let me start you off with one simple question:

What the hell is a "Hufflepuff"?

Every other house is pretty cut and dry. Gryffindor, griffin. Ravenclaw, raven. Slytherin, a bit abstract, but sensibly a snake.

Hufflepuff? Who knows? The thing on the crest is what, a ferret? Badger? What?

A quote of Helga Hufflepuff herself: "I'll teach the lot."

_We'll take the lot. _Though, I'm sure such a quote was meant to sound grand and diverse, we were open-armed to all witches and wizards who wished to learn- we'd accept anyone. But, there in lies the truth. We'd accept anyone, that is, if they didn't have a place elsewhere. Us Hufflepuffs were identity stricken, a mish-mash of those who weren't brave enough, smart-enough, or connected enough to be anywhere else. Loyal, unafraid of toil. It seemed as if the attributes the hat gave to us were only given so if they fit into perfect rhyme.

I remember, among many things from my first night at Hogwarts, verbatim, what the hat had gone on about as he was sorting me.

"Hmm…" The voice seemed to be coming from inside of my head, yet I wondered if anyone else around could hear it. "Well, right off the bat, not Gryffindor, definitely never Gryffindor. That takes bravery and niceties… You lack both of those."

"Hey!" I glowered at the brim above my head. True, perhaps, I wasn't exactly a sweet little girl. However, I was brave.

"Your idea of brave is quite flawed. While fighting to defend such things as honor and those where your loyalties lie is grand, you're a coward beyond belief when it comes to seizing the things that you want. You strive to find the answers to happiness with your fists, never your heart. However, you're just as underhanded and slimy as a Slytherin in those regards- you go looking for the fight yourself and battle it in the dirt." The hat paused. "But, no, you wouldn't fit the blood status bill for Slytherin, a bit too questionably murky is your heritage." The hat tsk-tsked. "A shame, as it seems you've no filter for violence and deception to achieve your means…Hm, as for wits, you've got plenty. I see, however, you're inclination for cutting corners only growing over the next seven years. The job may get done, however you'll never push yourself, so no Ravenclaw for you."

I had glanced down at the other first years, focusing on my friend Evan. I gave him an anxious look. Could he hear these awful things? My knuckles were white from clenched fists. _Coward? Murky heritage? Slimy? _

"Oh no, don't worry, no one can hear me but you." The hat chuckled slightly. "I can see now how close you are to those who you deem worthy of camaraderie. Loyal, where you see it fit. I know where you'll have to be then." I didn't expect the hat to bellow so loudly, so I had jumped as he declared "HUFFLEPUFF!"

"However, I'd like to give you a word of caution." The hat stopped me from hopping off of the stool. "While you may feel that you are capable of self satisfying, you may never find yourself truly happy in this life you've begun to build for yourself." He sighed slightly as I fidgeted. Professor McGonagall stood tensely by, confused as to why the hat was still muttering away at me. "Someone _will _come for you."

The hat had silenced then, right at the point that my interest had peaked.

Now looking back on it, a sane person would blame such words to an impressionable eleven year old for me turning out this way- as if I had merely used the character digestion as a map of how things should be. However, I knew deep down that what he had said must truly be me. I did indeed fight in the dirt; my hands were never clean in my dealings. My loyalties only lay where I let them- Evan, mainly, and my teammates when I fought on the Quidditch field. Perhaps I was underhanded and did cut a few corners. Life was too short to wait for rewards.

Here I sit, fifteen years old, still with zero prospects. No one had come for me. It was me, sitting alone against adversities.

I reached over and dipped my fingers again into the bottle I had brewed of Draught of Peace. As I lay on the roof just outside the Hufflepuff Common room, I stuck my fingers in my mouth, sucking them dry. As if it helped. As if peace was enough to change who I was inside. Still, it had become a regular thing, just before a Quidditch match, to drink it down and pray to God the release that I got from putting all my strength into slamming the Bludger at someone on the opposing team wouldn't go beyond that. Usually, I only took a few drops. However, today was the first match we were playing, and we were fortunate enough to play it against Gryffindor. A certain member of the Gryffindor team always seemed to be able to twist his way into my head, without even trying.

I sighed, dipping my fingers again.

I heard the window crack open. "Hey, Ev."

"You alright?" He asked.

I nodded. "Need some?" I held up the round bottle.

"Nah. I'm all set." I heard him climb out onto the roof. "You're drinking more than usual over there." He chuckled. "A certain someone on your mind?"

I corked the bottle. "We're gonna win this year." I nodded, looking at him. "We're playing them twice before they even get to anyone."

Evan grinned, holding out a hand. "Smith wants us in."

I took his hand, but glanced behind me. "It's not raining for once."

Evan stopped, looking back. "Don't say that, you're gonna jinx it!"

I laughed, climbing back through the window.

Before I could turn back, Zacharias Smith was staring at me, as if panicked. "Magdaline!Where's your uniform?" He demanded. "We're walking down in ten minutes!"

"Calm down," I assured, heading towards the girls' dorm. I tossed him the bottle. "Drink up, Captain. You're gonna need it."

I disappeared towards my room, closing the door behind myself and flicking my wand as I pulled it out. My uniform lined up neatly on my bed, along with the socks and underwear that I needed.

I dressed quickly. This was a big match for us. We were _never _the first game of the season, nor did we ever be play Gryffindor twice in the season unless we got to the cup, which we never did.

I glanced in the mirror quickly, gathering back my long brown hair in a tight ponytail, knowing that within the hour, a majority of the front of it would be falling out.

My harshly blue eyes glared back at me. _He's not getting to you today._

I left the dorms quickly, broom clutched in hand, back in the common room just in time to leave.

"We're gonna win today, guys." I grinned devilishly, glancing at Evan.

Smith glanced at the pair of us. Normally he would've gone into a freak-out lecture about playing fair, but I could tell the potion had done it's job.

"Yeah." He smiled broadly, addressing the whole team. "Right now, quick huddle."

We quickly created a tight circle. "We're winning today, guys!" Smith's cheeks were flushed with excitement.

"Hands in!" Evan called, and we all followed suit.

"On three," I whispered. "Fuck Gryffindor."

Everyone laughed, but nodded.

"One," Smith began.

"Two," Evan continued.

"Three!"

The common room echoed with the cry.

We headed out into the hallway, and Cedric Diggory began a beat with clicking his broom on the floor, concluding with proclaiming, "Hufflepuff!"

We all followed suit, throughout the castle. Not one teacher called us out on it, a few of the ghosts even trying to follow along.

When we passed Gryffindor's team on the pathway to the pitch, we only got louder. Each of us turned to stare down our respective Keepers, Seekers, Chasers, and Beaters. We weren't going down this time. We weren't intimidated.

As we reached the pitch, we called it out one last time, as loud as we could. "HUFFLEPUFF!"

_That's right. Fuck you, Gryffindor. _


End file.
